#RapeCulture

#EnoughisEnough #IBelieveSurvivors #Metoo #Timesup #Wakeup 

Photo by Kristina Flour on Unsplash

How many hashtags (#) do we need before we acknowledge the problem our society has? This problem spans age, gender, race, religion, ethnicity, politics, and socio-economic status. This is a moral issue.  We readily point out the abuses in other countries, while failing to acknowledge the abuses in our own. According to RAINN, an American is sexually assaulted every 98 seconds. We live in a culture that tolerates, condones, and enables rapists.

We are quick to dismiss the allegations of a child, woman, or man or to cast blame on the victim. Because believing them would shatter the perfectly crafted lies that we are hiding from everyone else - including ourselves. So, we say: Why was she walking by herself at that time of night? Why did she have on that outfit? Why was she in his room alone? She knew what time it was. For boys and men, it’s worse, because it brings in questions of sexuality and masculinity. We proclaim: a real man would have fought, or he must have liked it.

We condemn the very people who have been victimized; those walking around bearing the symptoms of the problem, and we mercilessly say how this one is lying; how that one wants money; or how the accused’s reputation has been ruined. I’m all for due process, truth, and justice. I know that all proclamations are not truth. However, the facts speak for themselves: less than a half of a percent (0.05%) of all reports of rape or sexual assault allegations by women are false (RAINN). Meaning, that in 99.5% of the time a woman reports, she is telling the truth. Let that sink in.

It’s easy to acknowledge the problem, when it’s somebody we don’t know, love, or admire. We say that kind of thing doesn’t happen in my home, family, or community. It happens over there for those people who don’t look like us or talk like us or walk like us. Yes, it happens here, because we are all those people over there. Ninety-three percent (93%) of child victims know their perpetrators – meaning only 7% of violators are strangers. In addition, 70% of rape victims know their attackers, and on college campuses that number increases to nearly 90%.

Photo by NOTAVANDAL on Unsplash

The Church is just as guilty – or even more so. We have the responsibility to protect the souls that God has entrusted to us. Yet, some wolves masquerading as shepherds are simultaneously teaching and preaching chastity and holiness, while feeding sex addictions and defiling children, women, and men – causing the very brokenness that we should be healing.

The hashtag #whyIdidntreport started trending last week. We don’t report, because we live in a rape culture that accepts the abuse, violation, and trafficking of human beings. We don’t report, because we were taught to keep our mouths closed. We don’t report, because we want to keep our families, friendships, and relationships intact. We don’t report, because we want to keep our sanity intact. We don’t report, but in our brokenness, we eat, drink, gamble, lie, mask, prostitute, smoke, and snort. Some of us even pray.

Father, in the Name of Jesus, I come to you asking you for forgiveness for the things that I have said about people and situations that I had no idea about. I apologize for my role in condemning people for the display of outward symptoms without knowing the extent of their inward problems. I apologize for my role in the debauchery, as well as in its denial. Let me be the light you have called me to be and let me be a catalyst for change.  I ask that you heal anybody reading this right now, who may have experienced abuse or trauma. I pray that those reading this, who have been perpetrators, will come to full repentance and will know the pardon of their sins. I pray for the Body of Christ – that we will take our rightful positions. For in 2 Chronicles 7:14, you say if your people, who are called by Your Name, will humble ourselves and will pray and seek your face and turn from our wicked ways, then You will hear from Heaven and will heal Our Land. Amen

For those needing prayer, please send an email to kopadmin@comcast.net. For more statistics on rape and sexual assault, please visit https://www.rainn.org/statistics.

© 2018 by Antoinette V. Barber